7 October 2014

Feeling like a failure

A long time has passed since my last post, but I’ve been feeling hesitant about writing due to some recent shopping failures. I was hoping that I could use this blog as a tool to keep me accountable but recently I’ve found myself reverting to some bad habits and I've been reluctant to own up here. However, one of my goals for 2014 was to be kinder to myself and not beat myself up for making mistakes so in the spirit of this I’m going to accept, let go and move on! As much as I hoped that writing on this blog would help me to make better choices, I also want it to be somewhere I can write honestly about the challenges I face on a daily basis trying to a conscious consumer. So on that note, I want to write about something which has been troubling me a great deal recently and that is mental clutter.

I’ve mentioned previously that as I make progress towards my goal of shopping more mindfully and creating a minimalist wardrobe, that my obsessive tendencies have resurfaced in other areas. This is something that I've only become aware of quite recently and I'm at a loss as to how to get a handle on it. As I declutter my home and limit the amount of items I buy I realised that I still spend a great deal of time planning purchases, obsessing over the optimal way to store my jewelry/clothes/scarves etc and concocting the ‘perfect’ skincare regime. All this = what I think of as 'mental clutter'.

As my interest in minimalism and simplicity has deepened, I want to shop more consciously but I struggle with the tendency to over analyse and research every purchase. As an example, I mentioned in my last post that I wanted to use more natural skincare. This has led to countless hours researching how to make a toner, and the best oils for my skin type. Part of my has enjoyed this little research project but there is also a part of me that feels overwhelmed by the amount of information and choice out there. I can now see that by being so strict this year with my clothing purchases, I had just transferred my compulsion to shop into other areas. So I've been swapping one bad activity for another, which was never my intention! 

Like everything in life, they key is to try and find balance between shopping mindfully, but not obsessively. To enjoy each purchase rather than constantly dreaming of the next purchase. To balance my enjoyment of dressing well and crafting a minimalist capsule wardrobe with all the other stuff going on in my life. I find it frustrating that I'm still struggling with this after so long but progress is rarely a straightforward linear path and I need to accept that I'll hit stumbling blocks along the way.

V x x                                           


  1. This is the first time I have looked at your blog, and this was the first article I read. I want to commend you for being candid with your readers. We are all a work in progress. I have also gotten bogged down in research on the web. There is simply too much to take in. So, just as society has a glut of consumerism, it also has a glut of information. As you mentioned in your article, the key is finding balance. Part of finding that balance is remembering that our time has value, more value than whatever thing we are buying or researching. I just wanted to give you an encouraging word. Keep working toward your goals. I'm cleaning out my closet, removing one mistake after another. I know I'll feel better when I've removed these mistakes from my life. I hope to be a more prudent shopper in the future.

  2. I really appreciate you taking the time to share such a thoughtful comment. Its nice to know that I'm not the only one struggling with these issues. Good luck with being a more prudent shopper in the future! Victoria x